Stories

I Don’t Do Blood

Posted by on Oct 19, 2012 in Stories | 0 comments

I Don’t Do Blood

I love science, and I’ve always thought that I might have become a pretty good doctor, except for one thing: the sight of blood immediately makes me nauseous and faint.

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Don’t Steal My Bananas

Posted by on Feb 24, 2012 in Stories | 0 comments

Don’t Steal My Bananas

One day, I realized that bananas were disappearing from my desk at work. Were my co-workers eating them? Were they stealing them to be funny? Was the nighttime clean-up crew throwing them away? I didn’t make a big stink about it, because they were, after all, just bananas.

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Public Urination

Posted by on Aug 24, 2008 in Stories | 0 comments

Public Urination

It was 11:30 AM on a Sunday, and I was at my friend’s condo. I was a little groggy, having spent the night before drinking hard. I desperately needed to pee, but the restroom was being used, and I could not find the restroom in the condo lobby, so I decided to take a quick whiz outside on the way to my car.

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A Conversation with Claire Danes

Posted by on Jan 16, 2008 in Stories | 0 comments

A Conversation with Claire Danes

Back in college, I was a social recluse and Internet junkie. I sat in my dorm room and chatted online with strangers on IRC (a text-based online chat service) every night. It wasn’t like Facebook or even AOL, where user names are tied to accounts and profiles. There was simply no way to confirm anyone’s identity, so you could be whoever you wanted. Quite often, especially in the local LA chat rooms, users would pretend to be celebrities. It was probably never true. Or so I thought.

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The Birth of Home Run Derby

Posted by on May 19, 2005 in Baseball, Stories | 0 comments

The Birth of Home Run Derby

My friend Rob and I played on our high school varsity baseball team. One very humid summer Houston evening, we headed outside with a plastic bat and ball and began pitching to each other. We made a game of hitting the ball over a light pole in front of my house. The game of Home Run Derby was born.

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